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Post by Cactus on Sept 14, 2004 17:10:02 GMT 1
Just got e-mailed this......
" Here's a true story that had me rolling in laugher when I read it. It's true! But a little off color for those that swing the other way."
"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to retrieve the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital.
Tomaszewski, and his homosexual partner Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong. "I pushed a cardboard tube up his rectum and slipped Raggot, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out "Armageddon", my cue that he'd had enough. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he wouldn't come out again, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."
At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman described what happened next. "The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a flame shot out the tube, igniting Mr. Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out like a cannonball."
Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.
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Post by ShaneMontez on Sept 14, 2004 20:41:10 GMT 1
That's not true. That can't be true. Is it true?
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Post by PThaGangsta on Sept 15, 2004 4:27:37 GMT 1
Lmao! funny stuff!
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Post by Stare on Sept 15, 2004 4:35:09 GMT 1
OH MY GOD!
That is the best thing Cactus has ever posted.
I'm just wondering how he got Spaz to admit to this happening to him
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Post by spaz on Sept 15, 2004 6:51:54 GMT 1
I am not reading it!
the thread title disagrees, but im a rebel without a cause and i smell like micko and look like im inbred
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Post by ShaneMontez on Sept 15, 2004 6:57:11 GMT 1
You dont need to read it because you know what it says.
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Post by Cactus on Sept 15, 2004 9:07:53 GMT 1
Yes I changed spaz name but you all guessed anyway
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Post by stocko on Sept 15, 2004 12:15:19 GMT 1
cactus knows it was spaz cos cactus was the other bloke!
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Post by Reaper on Sept 15, 2004 12:52:01 GMT 1
Was the gerbil ok?
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Post by stocko on Sept 15, 2004 13:20:51 GMT 1
its still running around inside of spaz
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Post by Cactus on Sept 15, 2004 13:36:19 GMT 1
no it suffered burns when expelled throu his ass it broke my i mean the other fella's nose
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Post by stocko on Sept 15, 2004 15:49:07 GMT 1
nah, he put the gerbil back in his ass!
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Post by Cactus on Sept 15, 2004 16:04:58 GMT 1
SO thats where it went
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