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Post by shinnstheory on Jan 22, 2005 19:13:22 GMT 1
Play my children. Plllaaayyyy....
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Post by Darth Peccatus on Jan 22, 2005 23:04:05 GMT 1
>Shot opens to a plain corridor, all metallic walls and fluorescent strip lighting, and a distant sound of thunder, growing louder by the milisecond...but before anyone can think of a plausible reason for time-disrupting butterflies or similar Ray Bradbury nonsense appearing in a (supposedly...) legitimate wrestling promotion, we are given a more sensible explanation, in the form of a panting, exhausted De'Si Nidea sprinting around a corner and into our range of view, with a group of plastic-coated, warmongering Imperial Stormtroopers hot on his heels. Attempting to draw a bead on the head of everyone's least favourite saber-wielding nonce, the troopers squeeze the triggers of their BlasTech E-11 rifles...<[/color]
ZING! PEEOW! ZAPPO!
>And unleash a devastating barrage of laser-blast sound effects, the small light-emitting diodes on the barrel of their guns blazing red like the eyes of so many bloodthirsty canines. Quick as a flash, however - or as quick as an undernourished nerd - De'Si halts, pivots straight around on the spot and draws his lightsaber, swinging its bright blue blade around in various complex defensive positions, struggling to deflect the...nothing...that the troopers so wished to kill him with. Emitting its trademark hum, the saber cuts the air like a pair of blunted safety scissors through a five-inch plate of solid steel; the stormtroopers, despite receiving no visible damage, collapse instantly. One oversells slightly, and smacks his head off the nearby plain metal wall next to him, earning a concussion for his troubles as he sinks into unconsciousness. De'Si stands absolutely rigid for a few more seconds, expecting another wave, before shrugging and deactivating his lightsaber.<[/color]
"Evidently, the casting budget wasn't quite as large as I thought...Hmm?"
>Nidea turns to face the camera, and we notice something different about him; there's a small tattoo on the left side of his neck. It appears to be a blue version of the sigil of the Rebel Alliance. De'Si seems to notice our gaze lingering on it, even though we, the audience, are nowhere near him, and he explains...<[/color]
"It's just a temporary transfer. Got it free with a lollipop. By the way, you got my good side, right?"
>The camera operator calmly informs De'Si that he doesn't have a 'good side'. Nidea scowls momentarily, before returning his attention to the camera, and our viewers.<[/color]
"Anyway, I'm glad to see you all still care so much for my endeavours. I'll be the first to admit that I've been...procrastinating a bit lately, but I assure you that I will not let any mere matters, such as boredom or having a social life, get in the way of defending you all, and the truly good people in this company - a regrettably small minority, but they do exist - from the taint of the Dark Side and its servants. Which was partly the reason for my presence at the Winter Frenzy show. I had hoped that, if the item that Soul Reaper craved so much - the World Title belt - was taken from his grasp, he would realise his mistakes in becoming lost within the maze-like corridors of hatred and arrogance. I thought I could bring him back to the side of good. I...was wrong. He is now bitter, and full of yet more loathing for almost everyone he ever meets. Very unfortunate indeed. I will keep an eye on that situation, but the will of the Force is calling me in other directions..."
>De'Si trails off, and stares blankly into the middle distance, a melancholy smile playing across his features. The camera operator, acting decisively, kicks Nidea in the shin. The Jedi doesn't flinch...for a few seconds. Then he collapses and cries like a five-year-old. The screen briefly fades to switch to a commerical, advertising a new washing-up powder that can clean your clothes AND your soul; it's called 'Out, Satan!'<
>A minute or so later, we return to the scene, and Nidea is standing again, though his reddened eyes, that gaze at us through sticky lashes, suggest he's only just managed to pull himself together.<[/color]
"Well, um...*sniff*...I probably won't be at TNT this week, so you'll have to make do without me. But I'm sure you'll be fine...*sniff*...now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go...clean myself up..."
>De'Si walks off-screen, quietly sobbing to himself as the camera operator cackles with glee. Then, Nidea leans back into shot...<[/color]
"Oh yes, and a couple of people have asked this, so to clarify; no, I won't be appearing in Episode 3. A pity, really. Anyway, good viewers, I will see you again, and until I do, may the Force be with you."
>De'Si vanishes for good this time, and the screen fades away as the camera operator mumbles 'Loser' under his breath...<[/color]#nosmileys
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Post by Scream on Jan 26, 2005 1:07:07 GMT 1
[glow=red,2,300]Rapper Ludacris is seen walking the halls of P2P. He keeps walking till he gets to Soundscream's door. He opens the door and walks in.[/glow]
Soundscream: Well look who it is.
Ludacris: What's up hommie, I saw what happened out there tonight. If I were Chilly I'd be scurred.
The two friends shake hands as Ludacris takes a seat
Soundscream: What brings you here man?
Ludacris: Since I'm in town I figured the gang and I would come and watch Scream take some punks number. And well, I think you need a new entrance song my man, and being in the business I figured I could help you out. Listen to this....
Ludacris hands Scream a listen to his MP3 player. "Get Back" is playing. Scream smiles
Soundscream: I like it man, I like it. Listen, I'll use it on one condition.
Ludacris: What's that Scream...
Soundscream: You let me get a little R and R with those two.
The camera pans to two ladies. Ludacris motions to them and they sit on Scream's lap.
Ludacris: Whoop, whoop, you got it playa!
Ludacris shakes SS's hand and leaves as the two women get close to Scream
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Post by Scream on Jan 27, 2005 3:47:59 GMT 1
Herc that promo was hilarious man.
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Post by Hercules on Jan 27, 2005 4:00:03 GMT 1
Thank you sir, I take great pride in my work.
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Post by Simz on Jan 27, 2005 17:37:21 GMT 1
CONITUED.......
Dollar Bill- Todays service will be about .....SIN!
Thats right all you SINNERS!! are going to ROT IN HELL
*Evil Laugh*
All the crowd starts to wisper to each other. The whole crowd is shocked by what Dollar Bill said.
Dollar Bill- That's right ROT IN HE...........
A middle aged man stands up.
M.A.M - How Dare you say that to us you are no..........
Suddenly a tiger runs up the asile, and jumps on the idiotic man, and stops him ranting. The tiger rips the man to pieces. While the man screams and rols over on the ground .
Dollar Bill - That is what happens when you inter rupt me! You stupid Bitch !
Simz turns his head to the back of the church, and nods with a smile on his face.
Simz- Hey man, took you long enough !
Dollar Bill - *cough* Gald you finaly came!
A figure come out of the shadows at the back of the church.
"the Tigger" Aladdin- Sorry guys, my tiger needed feeding !
Simz - Yo Al, are you sure you feed that thing enough ? cause he don't seem full to me.
Aladdin wistles for his tiger, and it come back to him. He then walks up the asile and takes a seat next to Simz. Simz tells Aladdin to keep is "pet" outside.
Dollar Bill- As i was saying, YOU SOULD ALL ROT IN HELL !
But.......I am here to save you, I am her with Jesus.
Aladdin starts to wisper to Simz.
Aladdin - I've heard about your match man, rember the Blood pack is there for you !
Dollar Bill-..........and that leads me on to the monster truck !!!
He points to the Giant of a truck behind him.
Dollar Bill- Now ! Simz is going to come up here. And come into my old Pimp, I mean SIN!!! truck !!
Simz goes on to the stage. Egerly awaiting to go into the truck.
Aladdin claps, but is doing it by himself.
His tiger turns round and growls at the silent crowd.
They all " Suddenly " start clapping.
Dolar Bill- Now! Simz it is time to see the awful affects of SIN!!!! * winks to Simz*
The both of them climb into the truck!
Dollar Bill - Now Simz, this ain't no normal monster truck.
Like Jesus said " All pimps need to ride in Style !"
So, I hooked this baby up with some hydrolics man!
Simz face just suddenly lights up, and the smile gets bigger on his face.
Simz- Well, I think I need to feel Sin!!
Dollar Bill also starts to smile.
Dollar Bill- *praying* Oh! God , have Mercy on our souls !
Dollar Bill then starts the engine and Simz flicks the switch.
And the Pimped out Beast starts bouncing. While shaking the whole glass church.
Simz- Thank you ! Jesus !
Then one more bounce then. *Shatter* the roof caves in .
The glass from the roof all falls on the crowd. As they scream.
Aladdin runs to the sage and says in to the mic.
Aladdin- Ah !.......Blood is thicker than water ! and Pleaes don't sue !
The scene fades away, with the picture of the Pimped monster truck, Bouncing.
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Post by McKenna on Jan 27, 2005 18:44:40 GMT 1
Follow on from Dickie's promo
Gary Roamer returns to his hotel, impressed with his evening's work trying to hijack WWE RAW. He is stood outside his hotel, where two young hotties flip him off. He shrugs his shoulders, and enters the room.
The lights are off, but he heads towards the bathroom, in the dark, the room illuminated by the lights of the city outside.
In a flash a dark shadow appears behind him, and as Gary turns round, the shadow appears to merge with Gary Roamers midriff. The shape folds in two, and vanishes. The crash in the bathroom is immense.
The shadow comes out of the bathroom, just the large shape of a man. He walks towards the room door, and switches on the light.
Da Man is stood there smiling, blood on his face. But it's clear it isnt his blood. He wipes his cheek with the back of his hand, sees the crimson, and smiles.
Finally the silence is broken by his snarling words.
DA MAN You tell that pissant Dickie from me, next time he wants to say something, grow a set of balls, and come say it to my face.
Da Man leaves the room, and growls to the camera man as he leaves, saying "take a look". He moves inside the room, and in the bathroom, Gary Roamer is laying in the walk in shower, glass all around him, blood in the drip tray. Roamer is folded in half like an accordean.
Not a sound comes from Dickie Chamone's press officer. The last thing we hear is the microphone carrier saying "ambulance, quickly".
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