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Post by brockandsable on Jan 10, 2007 21:18:01 GMT 1
Recently I've noticed that on Internet message boards, most people are from small towns and areas of the country (and the World) that I have never even heard of. Does this mean that the majority of you are smalltown, introverted, anti-socials with no knowledge of the outside world? Have you seen a wheel?By the way many of you post, it seems as if you live in a cave sometimes and have never felt the soft touch of a woman's inner thigh or tasted the bittersweet fluid that is known in the Western world as vaginal joose - *cough*Ecos*cough*cough*fart*. But who am I to assume? That's why I have taken it upon myself to create this creative, thought-provoking thread: So we can all see where the fuck you are from and read your explanations as to why you're so fucking out of sync with the world.The poll simply asks if you are happy with where you live. I've never been to London, but from what I hear, it's THE major metropolitian area in the U.K., which would effectively describe why Aladdin is in touch with the real world and knows what a vagina looks and feels like. I am from suburban Philly, but spend most of my time in Center City where I mingle with the younger folks, purchase incredulous amounts of weed, wine and cocaine, and indulge in risky behaviors at one of the many Asian "massage" therapy rooms.I also happen to know that Trent Acid is from Los Angeles and works Homeland Security at LAX, so he meets the real life celebrity women that we here on the east coast fantasize about while we are screwing our average, "damn-God-sent-me-you??" girlfriends. Actually, my girl likes it when I call her Mariah in the sack Scream resides from New York. Even though he's in Albany, he's not to far from the most exciting city on the planet. The best looking bitches are from the Big Apple. Nowhere will you find more athletic women who are in shape and are down for whatever. But Scream got married to a jew so that means she's locked at the knees and he has magazines in the basement. But Funkytown, TX? Fresno, CA?? Backwater, FL? Please explain yourselves, lest you be labeled a smalltown, perverted loser forevermore. And then there are the really miniscule peeps who don't even name a city like Keith Williams and "Maryland" or Stare and "Kentucky"; you fuckers live on farms, or what?? And then there's Liverpool. 'the fuck? I think Micko sells the crack to Cactus, that's why the fucker is so damn skinny. The nigga is 6 foot, 7 inches and weights a buck-fifty. Nigga smokes rocks with Chappelle. Okay, we're listening......
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Post by Aladdin on Jan 10, 2007 22:04:36 GMT 1
As you pointed out rather well, I am from London therefore I do indeed know what a pussy looks and feels like.
However, I voted that i wanted to move. I've wanted to move to Toronto, Canada for about a year now, especially since August. Life seems so much more relaxed and enjoyable there. E2 tells me the girls are really easy over there which is always a plus, but of course i already have someone in mind.
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Post by The Executioner on Jan 10, 2007 22:06:36 GMT 1
Stare swallows. yes al the women are easy even jt could have trouble not gettin laid here.
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Post by brockandsable on Jan 10, 2007 22:12:25 GMT 1
I've wanted to move to Toronto, Canada for about a year now, especially since August. That white girl has got a nigga whipped. Life seems so much more relaxed and enjoyable there. E2 tells me the girls are really easy over there which is always a plus, but of course i already have someone in mind. They are too easy, most white girls are though. Just wrap your little muhammad jihad up, lest you get the clap and land a seat next to Spackle in the clinic. yes al the women are easy even jt could have trouble not gettin laid here. Let's not make up stories now, Joe.
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Post by Aladdin on Jan 10, 2007 22:13:20 GMT 1
Hey! Don't make me ban you. JT couldn't get laid if his cock was an inch away from a pussy. The guy just wouldn't know what to do. Now apologise for saying such false things.
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Post by brockandsable on Jan 10, 2007 22:14:47 GMT 1
JT has a cock?
'the fuck outta here....
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Post by brockandsable on Jan 10, 2007 22:15:20 GMT 1
'the fuck outta here....
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Post by brockandsable on Jan 10, 2007 22:15:42 GMT 1
GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!! ;D
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Post by Aladdin on Jan 10, 2007 22:19:33 GMT 1
It's minute, according to Stare.
That means very very very very small, JT.
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Post by Spackle on Jan 11, 2007 2:30:24 GMT 1
FunkyTown is Fort Worth, Fort Worth is Dallas, Dallas is Fort Worth. We're a metroplex. We're THE metroplex. And the women fuck as long as you got a dick and some rims. (Well, the Mexican ones, anyways.) All the white ones think they're from California. They fuck if you got a dick and some money. And one of those queer little shell necklaces. The idea is they all fuck. ALOT. And they all give you diseases. Most of which have four limbs and WON'T EVER SHUT THE FUCK UP.
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Post by brockandsable on Jan 11, 2007 3:13:20 GMT 1
lol.
Ah, I see. Yeah, last time I was in Texas (1988), Dallas and Fort Worth were often considered one city. I stayed in Arlington which is somewhere in between.
So if Funkytown is Dallas and Dallas is a big and trendy city, how does Ninny get away with sporting those nerdy, thick coke bottles?
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Post by Reaper on Jan 11, 2007 3:33:01 GMT 1
Fresno isn't backwater you dipshit. The problem is that its mostly known as an agricultural haven and not a big corporate melting pot. For the most part, its the old school farming community that is slowly but surely being destroyed so that we can make way for a more "Big City" feel. Its going to completely fuck up produce in this country should that happen, but since the only thing on the mind of most of the politicians on both sides of the parties is expansion, its inevitable that the farm land will be built over with condo complexes and gated housing communities.
Basically, Fresno is the place to be in the central valley and all the other towns around it are either still farmers or they've all just been overrun with "farm laborers"... or rather the wetbacks that will never know an English word. North of here the next best place is Sacremento and south of here, I suppose the best place to be would be Bakersfield. Those cocksuckers always get the better concerts. After that, you can either continue west to the coast or go east to Nevada and Arizona.
But by the time this area becomes too large for its own good, chances are I'll either be on my way off or will have completely shifted from this mortal coil.
Stare is from the Lexington area of Kentucky and Keith Williams is from Trailer Park, USA. Same as JT.
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Post by Trent Matsunoshin on Jan 11, 2007 4:11:11 GMT 1
Fresno isn't backwater, it's what one might call a college town, everything revolves around Fresno State.
LA is driving distance (about 5 hours) from there so I've been there a few times.
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Post by Reaper on Jan 11, 2007 4:15:37 GMT 1
Everything does not revolve around the college. Everything revolves around the Riverpark area out north. If its not at the malls, then its down at Riverpark where the Best Buy and big theatre is. The only thing at Fresno State is there Ag program and the Save Mart Center. Other than that, the college is nothing.
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Post by Spackle on Jan 11, 2007 5:05:02 GMT 1
So if Funkytown is Dallas and Dallas is a big and trendy city, how does Ninny get away with sporting those nerdy, thick coke bottles? You know who Buddy Holly is? Some dipshit who boned Marilyn Manson and wore some goofy glasses? Well, today every dipshit who wants to fuck a chick who looks like Manson wheres those goofy fucking things. Nothing to do with Ninny, but the idea of Buddy Holly riding Manson makes me giggle.
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Post by Cactus on Jan 11, 2007 14:28:41 GMT 1
Liverpool is the capital of culture so fuck london We gave the world the most succesful european football team ( most trophies ) We gave the world the beatles ( sorry ) We helped build the titanic ( sorry again ) And i am so skinny cause mick beats me up and robs my lunch money
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Post by brockandsable on Jan 11, 2007 16:13:24 GMT 1
So, if I am understanding this right, Fresno doesn't revolve around the college, rather it revolves around a fucking farm. A farm with horses, pigs, smelly goats and a farmer named Chris who specilizes in "milking the cow" so-to-speak. How does it feel to work alongside wetbacks, picking peanuts from a field and apples from the orchard tree?
And Cactus, stop lying, we all know that Liverpool is the ghetto of the U.K. That explains why Micko lives there.
And you call 5 hours driving distance? I forgot how spread out everything is out West. Over here in Philly, you drive when you're out in the burbs, and use public transit while venturing in the city. Well, the smart ones do anyway; they learn driving "in the city" is a goddamn headache.
And Spackle, stop lying: NIN Horror could never get any pussy sporting those thick, fucking coke bottles.
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Post by Aladdin on Jan 11, 2007 17:53:16 GMT 1
London is THE city in England. You don't here anyone saying "Oh, i feel like a trip. Let's go to Liverpool." It just doesn't happen. London is the tourist attraction. London is the place to be. That's why the olympics are being held in London.
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Post by RAGE on Jan 11, 2007 18:26:32 GMT 1
only cos noone else applied
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Post by Aladdin on Jan 11, 2007 19:30:59 GMT 1
You're from London. You should be on my side!
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Post by stocko on Jan 11, 2007 20:54:12 GMT 1
london sucks donkey dick!
people are rude, it smells and its far too expensive!
al, y'all can keep the olympics mate
in closing liverpool rocks!
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Post by Aladdin on Jan 11, 2007 22:42:31 GMT 1
Liverpuddlians are the only people who like Liverpool. No-one else does. Whereas people all around the world LOVE London. Therefore Liverpool is shit (apart from the football team) and London owns.
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Post by brockandsable on Jan 11, 2007 22:48:31 GMT 1
London is THE city in England. You don't here anyone saying "Oh, i feel like a trip. Let's go to Liverpool." HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! ;D
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Post by Faster Pussycat! on Jan 12, 2007 0:46:02 GMT 1
people all around the world LOVE London. That's a big bag of bollocks and you know it.
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Post by Reaper on Jan 12, 2007 7:41:26 GMT 1
E2's post up there makes me question his IQ.
And people don't love London, they love the tourist attractions there. If everything else in London broke off and fell off the planet, nobody else would give a shit.
Also Mick's view of London "people are rude, it smells and its far too expensive!", also applies to L.A. as well as portions of San Francisco... and from what I've heard also New York.
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